Mentor’s comment-
- In the introduction briefly explain why it’s always the poor who are most vulnerable.
- In the body quote the facts of the current situation. Discuss the hardship that the poor get exposed to owing to such a situation; explain the measures that need to be taken to resolve the situation.
Explain the concerns over the fact that the official strategy to fight the virus places the major responsibility on citizens, of whom a majority are poor without access to basic amenities. Explain
what needs to be done. - Conclude with way forward.
Please Review OrderID – ~0000232028
Hi Parakh
Rephrase your introduction.
Highlight the vulnerability of poor in this pandemic situation.
Do not directly come to measures, first give reasons why the India’s poor will be tremendously affected. You can write like –
-Low investment in public health
-State’s unpreparedness
Then write the measures.
Follow a proper structure.
It is economic aspect not economically, work on grammar..
Need to add more points in the measures, you can write that pensions must be doubled and home-delivered in cash ,commit 3% of GDP on health, nationalize private healthcare etc.
Try to cover different dimensions to fetch better marks.
Keep writing,you will improve.
order id #0000236123
Hi Uttam
Lackluster introduction,briefly explain why it’s always the poor who are most vulnerable.
Lack of employment , lack of food, lack of money- these 3 points can be merged into one, write crisp and concise so that you can add more content.
Write points like low investment in public health, State’s unpreparedness left the he poor left with meagre services etc.
Some good points in the measures part but need to add more like you can write that pensions must be doubled and home-delivered in cash ,commit 3% of GDP on health, nationalize private healthcare etc.
Good conclusion.
Avoid using unnecessary capital alphabets in between of a sentence.
Work hard,you will improve.
Please review
Order ID- #0000237952
Hi PSR
Good introduction.
Refrain from drawing a line after paragraphs.
You have explained the vulnerability of poor in a decent manner , use of flow chart is really good.
The question is specifically about the poor, so do not write the general measures like use of mask, clinical trials etc.
Adhere to the demand of the question.
Mention the need to increase the percentage of GDP on health .
Avoid using short forms .
Lackluster conclusion, again conclude with some way forward with respect to poor, like you can write nationalisation of private healthcare .
Keep writing ,you will improve.
MOJO0204R00N55952566
Hi Chester
Rephrase your introduction, there are grammatical and spelling mistakes.
Give proper heading, instead of writing reasons for the above, write reasons for the vulnerability of poor.
The question is about the poor, not about MSME,NBFC etc.
Adhere to the demand of the question.
Write the importance of healthcare as the basic need of poor.
Conclusion is not according to the demand of the question, conclude with some way forward with respect to poor.
Work on content.
Avoid using short forms like wrt,govt etc.
Keep writing,you will improve.
Payment ID: #0000230867
Hi Deepika
Good introduction.
You have explained the challenges in a decent manner.
Need to stress upon the need of improving public healthcare system along with measures like MGNREGA , PDS etc.
Quote some examples of other nations to fetch better marks.
Overall a decent attempt.
Persistence is the key to success,keep writing,you will succeed.
Order no. #0000233081
Hi Dakshina
Lackluster introduction, briefly explain why it’s always the poor who are most vulnerable.
In the effects on pandemic, you have written access of sanitation, access of medical care etc..
Instead write like no proper access to medical care.
Work on the selection of the words.
Some good points in measures part like shramik buses, but need to add more like improving health infrastructure, pension should be increased etc.
Providing houses to rural people- is a long term measure, and also write about poor people no rural people, there is a difference.
Work hard, keep writing !
#0000223024
Hi Taran
Good introduction.
How lack of legal aid is an impact of pandemic, write in accordance of the demand of the question.
Work on grammar, many of your sentences need to be rephrased.
Lackluster conclusion,you can give the example of Spain and New Zealand and nationalize private health care as the way forward.
Work on diversification of content.
Work on sentence formation.
Improve the presentation of the answer.
Keep working hard,you will succeed.
please review
Hi Amandeep
First thing, work on your handwriting, write neat and legible.
Lackluster introduction, explain why it’s always the poor who are most vulnerable.
Write crisp and concise.
Give reasons why the India’s poor are tremendously affected.
You have explained the measures part in a good manner.
Always give some concluding remarks,conclude with some way forward with respect to poor, like you can write nationalisation of private healthcare .
Work on presentation to get better marks.
Do not get demotivated by the marks,keep writing,you will improve.
Apologies, wrong answer.
UPI Payment ID: 18617240079
@Parth Verma Sir, please review.
Hi Shubham
Try to complete your answer in maximum two pages.
Adhere to word limit.
Try to divide your long introduction into two parts- introduction and reasons why the poor are the worst affected.
You have comprehensively explained the measures, keep it up.
Good conclusion.
Overall a decent attempt.
Keep writing,you will succeed.
Payment id : #0000237030
Hi Unnati
Good introduction.
Use of flow chart is appreciable but try to make it little neat and presentable.
Content is good and well placed.
You have explained the measures part in a comprehensive manner, keep it up.
Good conclusion.
Work on your handwriting,avoid scribbling.
Work on sentence formation, many of your sentences needs to be rephrased.
Overall a decent attempt.
Be consistent, you will succeed.