“Mentor’s Comment”
In introduction talk about the evolution of paintings by giving Examples from Ancient to Modern age like Ajanta and Bagh Caves paintings, Mughal and Rajput paintings and Modern paintings like Bengal School of art
In body- divide your answer in two parts
Political scenario:- Idea about political situation we get from paintings putting special focus medieval and modern times
Socio-cultural life:- in this section talk about scenes of daily lives from ajanta, religious Outlook like radha krishna themes, rising nationalism depicted by BharatMata of Abanindranath Tagore etc
Conclude your answer with remarks in favour of the statement given in the question
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AABHA,
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Going by your answer it seems you have
good knowledge of the topic, yet you are not able to justified the demand of the question.
your introduction is good but try to make it short
you need to work upon your structure
Rather than dividing periodically divide your body into two part Political and socio-cultural sections this will bring more clarity to your arguments.
conclusion is good.
overall it was a fine attempt but there is a lot of scope for improvement, keep writing. Best wishes
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your Introduction is good but you can make it short.
But it seems you failed to understand the demand of the question, pls read question carefully.
Question is not about paintings only so rather than talkin about specific examples and what they represent you should have talked about political scenario and social-cultural life separately and than using examples to justify your arguments.
pls go thorough the Mentor’s comments
You have a good way of expression but please be more careful to understand the demand of the question.
keep writing we’ll improve together, Best wishes
#416440
4.5/10
Your Intro is good (but Conclusion, as into, expressing SAME idea, that is importance of paintings, you can be more specific in your concluding remarks.
Main body of the answer is good specially political scenario, yet still you can refine your sub headings (religious outlook of state, External influence and add more important subheadings like Rise of regional kingdoms ( idea we get from Rajput and Pahari paintings), foreign relations ( Mughal’s with Persian sultans) etc
you can divide Socio-cultural section also in subheadings.
overall good attempt, Keep writing 🙂
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2/10
Your introduction is fine but still can be refined.
In your main body section you talked primarily talked about “What is there in various paintings” rather you had to talk about what ideas we can deduct from paintings.
you totally missed the political and socio-cultural aspect except when you talked about freedom movement.
You need to improve your structure, try to write in short paragraphs, used headings and subheadings.
So please read the question properly, and you can also take help from Mentor’s comments.
You have potential just keep writing dedicatedly, we’ll improve together 🙂
Also pls avoid committing factual mistakes in the answer.
Humayun brought Persian painters, Jahangir was the painter.
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Kartikey,
Your introduction is good,
Socio-cultural section is very generic try to be more specific.
you can give better headings than substantiate with Examples like Dominance of religious themes, patronage to art by rulers rising nationalism, scenes of Bazars, conditions of women (paintings of Raja Ravi Verma) etc
Your political section is good here you can add more points like Rise of regional kingdom, religious outlook of the state etc.
Conclusion is missing, always conclude your answer
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Santosh,
you have written a very generic answer.
structure of the answer is fine but you need to be more specific in every section of the question.
Give arguments separately than substantiate with examples.
Like Political Scenario can we discussed in subheadings like: rise of regional power center as depicted from Rajput and Pahari paintings, Idea of kingship- king being divine, halo around the paintings of Mughal rulers etc
same breaking into subheadings can be done socio-cultural sections.
You’re going good. Keep writing 🙂
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Sakshi
You have written a good answer.
your structure of the answer is also good just try to be more neat.
but rather writing painting first try to write your arguments and than mention paintings as examples.
you can also add subheadings like religious outlook of the state ( use of Hindu religious symbol in paintings During Akbar’s rule- Secular outlook, ban on depiction of livings by Aurangzeb- orthodox outlook), State patronage, Idea of Kingship etc.
you can be more specific in Socio-cultural section: idea about quality of life, scenes of bazar, condition of women etc.
conclusion was fine until you stretched it to make the same point that you made in intro.
Keep writing 🙂
4.5/10
Thanks Sir!
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Arpit,
your introduction and conclusion is good.way of expression is also good.
but pls read question carefully and try to understand the demand of the question you missed a whole section (Political scenario).
also the core demand of the question is not what in the paintings but what idea we deduct from the paintings so these ideas must be your subheadings than use name or type of paintings t0 support your arguments.
keep writing, we’ll improve it together 🙂
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Utkarsha,
please try to read the question properly. these are practice questions so take your time and do multiple reading if necessary.
you have knowledge about the paintings and what they contains as you have written only about that in the first page, but that is not asked in the question. (take the help of mentor’s comment)
Second part of the answer should be your main body of the answer and you should have used examples to expand this part.
However don’t get dishearten it’s just Day one we have a long way to go. keep writing and reading other good answers.
we’ll improve 🙂
Thank you Sir, will surely work upon it.
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Deepali,
first of all be mindful of the fact that you’ll get two pages to write a 10 marker question so pls write answer in that space.
Introduction must be related to the question so try to write introduction as close as possible to the question.
Write ans into small paragraphs it will enhance visibility of your answer.
In main body part try to address both part Political and Socio-cultural separately.
you have enough factual knowledge about the paintings use it justify your arguemts.
pls go through some good answers written by fellow aspirants and read Mentor’s comments.
Keep writing, I’m sure you’ll improve 🙂
Thank you sir!
Plz review
Siddarth,
pls read question carefully, you committed the same mistake as done by other also.
you missed a whole part i.e. political scenario.
also question is not about the aesthetics and content of the paintings rather what idea of history we get from them.
pls go through mentor’s comments and read good ans above.
keep writing 🙂
Sir plz review
upload it on paper 4 question page.
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Rupesh,
your introduction is good but it’s very long, shorten it. also We do not have any evidence of Murals from Mauryan (Ashoka) age so try to avoid such factual error especially in the introduction. Avoid drawing such rough sketches it doesn’t look good also out of demand of the question.
You have made some good point in body part like evidence of migration of artist, this can also be cited as an evidence of rise of regional power centers. add more points to it like royal patronage, nature of state’s religious policy (secularism under akbar, orthodox outlook of Aurangzeb) etc.
But try to maintain periodical hierarchy (you have written Mughal before Palas)
In socio-culture part also you made few good points (situation of women) but try to add more points in this section also.
Your conclusion is very good.
structure of the ans can be improved like use of subheadings.
read other’s answer as well.
over all fine attempt, keep writing 🙂
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Yash,
your introduction and conclusion is fine.
structure of the answer is also good.
but content of the answer is rather generic, for getting good marks in paper 1 you have to be more specific. pls try to do that.
subheadings and content needs to be exchanged with each other, as question demands you to write about the idea of political and socio-cultural history that get from the paintings. so use name of the paintings to substantiate your ideas rather using them as headings.
read above answer for good points to add in your answer,
It’s just a start, we’ll improve together, keep writing 🙂
thank you sir, will try to improve
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Anupam
your introduction and conclusion is really good.
Be mindful of the fact that you’ll get two pages for a 10 marker que so use proper space from now on, it’ll help you in space management in Mains Exam.
Your factual knowledge is fine but it doesn’t fulfill the demand of the question.
question is not just about the paintings in various eras but also about ideas of those eras we get from the paintings.
you need to write about the political scenario and socio-cultural life as depicted by paintings separately, so you must had divide your answer in those two sections.
Go through the mentor’s comments for help and read fellow aspirants answer, it’ll help you in improving fast.
Best wishes, Keep writing 🙂
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Vishal,
it seems you fail to understand the demand of the question.
you have written only “what is in the paintings” but the demand of the question is to write what idea of history you get from the paintings vis-a-vis political scenario and socio-cultural life.
but its fine this is the mistake committed by many aspirants.
in your body part you should have divide your answer into two sections political and socio-cultural than write ideas of history using various examples (you have enough knowledge just need to analyse a bit more)
Also There is scope of improvement in conclusion and intro.
I appreciate your efforts, don’t worry just keep writing we’ll improve with time 🙂
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Rajlaxmi,
timeline to review an answer is 72 hours but we try to do it as soon as possible, so pls avoid multiple posts, your answer will get reviewed with single post as well so don’t worry.
Now coming to your answer,
firstly, pls try to write your ans on a A4 size sheet so to get real UPSC space experience.
your introduction and conclusion are really good.
But you need to organize main body section of your answer.
Medieval age starts in India after reign of Harsha (7th-8th Cen. AD) so Ajnata. ellora bagh paintings comes essentially in Ancient age ( try to avoid such factual errors).
your ans is full of factual information so knowledge is not an issue for you but rather then just mentioning points under political or socio-cultural aspects try to deduct idea of history from paintings. For example paintings like Ajanta Bagh shows royal patronage,
Rajput paintings gives idea about rising regional power centers etc.
Same deduction of historical ideas from paintings can be applied in Socio-cultural section.
Go through others’ answers as well also read mentor’s comments it’ll help in improving your understanding.
Keep writing 🙂
Thank you Sir.
thank you for your response @Swatantra sir, please consider my yesterday’s answer.
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Mradul,
Your introduction is Good. but you have given too much space to evolution aspect, which is not the core part of the question so give less space to fringe part and focus more on core demand of the question.
structure of the ans is fine.
No need to explain figure which is self-explanatory, just label it (fig: label)
good points written in Political scenario and socio-cultural section just add more points like Rise of regional power centers, Religious outlook of the state etc.
Overall very good attempt. Keep writing 🙂
thank you sir 🙂 will improve.
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Shikhar,
your Introduction and conclusion are really very good.
Try to cover all the possible aspects of the question, you missed political scenario (read question carefully).
You have covered socio-cultural aspect very well but you should have made various ideas of social and cultural life your heading than substantiating your arguments with examples of paintings you have given.
read fellow aspirants answers it’ll give you more points.
keep writing 🙂
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Deepanshu,
your introduction is fine.
But you failed to understand the demand of the question.
Question doesn’t ask you to write about various paintings in India rather it is asking to write about the historical idea that we get from paintings in Political and socio-cultural life of india.
Give more focus on analysis part and use your factual knowledge to prove your points.
Read Mentor’s Comments and answers of fellow aspirants it’ll help you in improvement.
Keep Writing 🙂
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Akash
You have written a very long introduction, try to shorten it, always write smaller paragraphs.
Be mindful of the fact that you’ll get two pages for a 10 marker que so use proper space from now on, it’ll help you in space management in Mains Exam.
Try to divide main body of the answer in headings (political scenario and Socio-cultural life) so to enhance the visibility of your answer.
you have enough factual knowledge just try to give analysis of historical ideas that we get from these paintings under headings rather than just writing what paintings contains.
read other aspirants answers it’ll help you to improve.
Keep Writing 🙂
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Aabha,
Your introduction and conclusion are fine.
you also covered all the aspects of the questions but arguments are very limited. Write in smaller paragraphs also try to divide your answer into headings and sub headings it’ll improve visibility of the answer also will help you multiple arguments.
Give examples with each arguments.
It seems you have good knowledge of the topic just need to work upon your arguments.
you’ll improve just Keep writing:)
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