Mentor’s comment-
- https://indianexpress.com/
article/opinion/columns/ galwan-encounter-india-china- border-dispute-russia-us- india-foreign-relations-c- rajamohan-6482305/ - In the intro, you can mention the deterioration of relations with China following the Galwan incident.
- In the body, as contentious issue mention-boundary issue, widening trade deficit, clash for dominance in the region, opposition to India’s global aspirations, support to Pakistan on terrorism etc. In the scope of cooperation with the U.S., you can mention the U.S.’s interdependence on China, uncertainty in the U.S. politics, India’s focus on maintaining autonomy in diplomacy etc.
- Conclude by mentioning the need for a re-look of India’s China policy against the backdrop of changing circumstances.
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Hi Taran
Rephrase your introduction, ‘they did hit the lowest point’ did not make sense.
Introduction should be catchy.
In the issues part,some good points but need to add more like CPEC issue, Balochistan issue,debt diplomacy of China in neighborhood etc.
Think of various perspectives before writing to get good marks.
USA issue- some positive points but do critical analysis,like you can write that alliance with USA can drift Russia , and there is election in US and Trump administration struggles to manage the COVID crisis so we need to rethink.
Then suggest some way forward.
Brainstorm before writing and think broader.
Work on handwriting and underline keywords.
Keep writing,you will improve.
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The last page of the answer is wrongly not uploaded.
Kindly find the last page attached below
Hi Sumona
Good introduction.
You have mentioned very general points in the causes of dispute,add more diverse and current points like CPEC issue, BRI issue, trade deficit, debt diplomacy of China in neighborhood etc.
Try to cover different verticals.
And always try to relate your answer especially of GS2 with current affairs.
In the measures part, you have written that compel America to use Indian products, avoid these type of absolute terms.
Brainstorm before writing.
Work on content.
Improve your basic grammar as many sentences need to be rephrased.
Work hard!
Do not get demotivated by the marks, keep writing !
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Hi Deepika
Good introduction.
You have explained the issues between India-China in a diverse manner,keep it up !
You can make some diagram to get better marks.
The structure of the answer is good.
Write some more points in way forward .
You can write that India should now propose the expansion of the Quad’s scope with a possible exploration of a collective defence architecture like NATO and effort must be made to regain the relationship with Russia.
Good conclusion.
Keep writing,you will succeed.
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Hi Kritika
Introduction is good.
Use some headings and subheadings to present your answer in a structured manner.
Rephrase your China-Pakistan point.
Issues are well explained.
USA issue- some positive points but do critical analysis,like you can write that alliance with USA can drift Russia , and there is election in US and Trump administration struggles to manage the COVID crisis so we need to rethink.
Good conclusion.
Work on content.
Improve your basic grammar.
Underline keywords to convince examiner easily.
Keep writing !
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Hi Dakshina
Do not judge the quality of the issue, write abut the intensity.
Use your subheadings wisely, you can merge your points ‘geopolitics’ and ‘joint efforts’ because these two speak about China-Pakistan .
Write crisp and concise.
Give proper heading, for example you have written ‘scope of alliance’ ,it does not mention alliance with whom.
Content is good.
Give some way forward .
You can write that India should now propose the expansion of the Quad’s scope with a possible exploration of a collective defence architecture like NATO and effort must be made to regain the relationship with Russia.
Work on presentation .
Improve your handwriting.
Keep writing.
MOJO0206200D40884686
Hi NJ
Good introduction.
You have covered the issues between India-China in a quite comprehensive manner, keep it up.
Try to make some map diagram also to fetch better marks.
You have the critical analysis of India’s alliance with USA, appreciable.
Try to manage your space so that you can write some way forward .
You can write that India can welcome the US proposal to expand G7 to include India, Russia, Australia and South Korea without China as a member.
Good conclusion.
Content is good and well placed.
Overall a good attempt.
Keep writing.
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Hi Parakh
Need to rephrase your introduction.
Some good points in the issue part, but to add more points you can go through NJ’s answer.
Use of diagram is appreciable.
Indo-US alliance is well explained, keep it up.
It is India’s collaboration not jointness, work on the selection of the words.
Give some way forward like what India can do on different fronts (economic,political etc).
Good conclusion.
Work on handwriting and presentation.
Persistence is the key to success, keep writing,you will succeed.
MOJO0204R00N55952566
Hi Chester
Content is good in your introduction but so many grammatical errors !
It is string of pearls not the necklace, use suitable words.
Issues between India-China are well explained.
Do not use short forms like b/w, govt etc.
Rest of the content is good and well placed.
Underline keywords .
Good concluding remarks.
Overall a decent attempt.
Work on basic grammar and presentation.
You can use some map diagram also to get better marks.
Keep writing,you will succeed.
Id#0000229702
Please review
Hi Aastha
Good introduction.
Write crisp and concise as there is a word limit and space limit too.
Write India’s alliance with USA under a different heading, write advantages and disadvantages of it briefly.
Demarcating of international boundaries is not any country’s specific work.
Write other way forward like you can write that India should now propose the expansion of the Quad’s scope with a possible exploration of a collective defence architecture like NATO and effort must be made to regain the relationship with Russia.
Good conclusion.
Work on space management.
Keep writing,you will succeed.