“Mentor’s Comments”
Mentors comment –
Introduce your answer with writing something about what is law and ethics
Body: explain the domain of laws and ethics in human life ,how boundaries set up by law and ethics ensure long lasting peace in the society, how they are complimentary.
But not necessarily mutually inclusive as some action can be legal but very unethical e.g. – in a democracy not giving vote is not against law but totally against spirit of democracy;
Also when law is not explicit, it is ethics that guides e.g. code of ethics for civil servant.
Conclude with pointing out how Ethics has one major dimension of supplementing law, there may not be duty of performing an act but people/civil servants do it as guided by ethics.
In civilized life, Law floats in a sea of Ethics (Earl Warren)
Ref id 422329
Please review
Vishal,
You have written a little lengthy introduction. Always try to write introduction in one paragraph only.
The core demand of the question was how law and ethics ensure peaceful society. You have not properly understood this aspect of question.
Law guides society to peace explicitly whereas ethics compliment it implicitly.
Further in next part of answer you were suppose to address the question of whether ethics mean law abiding always. You could have give some arguments with example that there can be ethical action which doesn’t necessarily are legal.
Always first try to analyse the question and then frame a structure in your mind.
Also, try to give atleast 3/4th of your answer to core demand of the question.
You have the content, mold it as per the demand of the question.
Keep writing for improvement 🙂
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Subhashree,
Your introduction is good. You can further improve it by one example of law e.g. indian constitution.
Flow of argument is also good. There is one suggestion for 2nd paragraph of your answer. There you have started addressing 2nd part of question – how ethics doesn’t necessarily mean law abiding. You must mention this line there. Better underline it so that examiner can know you are writing 2nd part.
Conclusion is also good. Overall well attempted.
Keep writing, keep improving
5.5/10
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Sakshi,
Your introduction is good. It can be further improved by mentioning some example of law in introduction itself.
What you have mentioned in 3rd paragraph is the demand of actual answer. It should have covered atleast 50-60 words.
You have to mention how law – by means of rules, punishment, reward- and ethics – by means of self regulation ensure peace. Now you have to give example of this.
Also, one example for one line of argument is enough. Mentioning 3-4 example for one single point doesn’t make any difference.
Make it a rule that one argument should follow one example.
In 2nd part of answer you have to explain how ethics go beyond law and ethics doesn’t necessarily mean following law. It could have used the example of abortion you mentioned in this.
Always try to conclude on some positive note like – both law and ethics supplement each other in ensuring peace.
You have good content but need to mold that as per demand of question.
Keep writing to improve further.
3,5/10
Please review sir
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Sushmita
Your introduction is good.
You have good knowledge but you need to mold it according to questions demand.
Under your first heading you have given good points. To further improve it add example to it.
Your 2nd heading is not what is asked in question. The question was whether ethics is necessarily law abiding. Always try to give direct heading to make your answer more appealing. Within this part you have to clearly say ethics is beyond law and supplement it. here you can give example of slavery given by you.
Your conclusion and 1st line of your 1st subheading contradict each other. In ethics paper try to make concrete ethical argument without contradiction. It will give more weight to your answer
Keep writing to improve further:)
4.5/10
Red_id# 422544
Anupam,
You have understood the demand of the question well.
Introduction is where you can work to improve. Try to give example in introduction what do you mean by law.
Main body part you have attempted well. If you can add example with your arguments in this part it would make your answer more appealing.
In conclusion part you have again repeated the same line you has mentioned in introduction. Try to use some different line. Try to give conclusion on a positive note.
Overall well attempted.
Keep writing to improve further 🙂
5.5/10
Ref id – 0000422288
Kindly review my answer.
Sonal,
Your introduction is good. To further improve it you can add example of what do you mean by law e.g. Indian penal code.
You have attempted well.
Only suggestion for you is add examples in your answer. It will give depth to your answer and would fetch more marks.
When you are attempting 2nd part of the answer i.e. whether ethics is necessarily law abiding, you have attempted it but it is hidden in your overall answer.
Try to give different subheadings to your answer so that each subpart is easily visible.
Overall well written.
Keep writing to further improve your quality 🙂
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Vamsidhar,
You have not understood the demand of the question.
What you have mentioned as passing line in 3rd paragraph – ethics and laws ensure peace, it was the core answer.
You have to explain how ethics and laws ensure peace. Laws by punishment, reward and ethics by self control.
Thereafter you have to explain how ethics doesn’t demand necessarily on laws. You have mentioned it but has not molded it as per demand of question.
Also, there is no need to give multiple example for same argument. One example is enough for one argument.
You have the content mold it as per question’s demand.
Keep practicing to improve further.
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Sumita Dowerah,
Your introduction is good.
But you have more or less written What was mentioned in the mentors comment. It is to guide your thinking process only. Try to write answer with your original thoughts. It will better serve the purpose of this practicing exercise.
Also, you have written very less words. Atleast try to write 1 and half page for 10 marks question.
You can add more arguments like how laws and ethics ensure peace – laws by rewards, penalties and ethics by self control.
Read others’ answers as well and Keep writing 🙂
3.5/10
ref id: 0000420326
Deepali,
Your introduction is good. You can further improve it by adding example of what is law.
In main core answer you have attempted well the first part – ethics and laws are needed for peaceful society.
In 2nd part of answer – whether ethics necessarily mean law abiding. You have given only one example and has not explicitly attempted this part.
Try to give different subheadings to your answer so that you attempt each part of answer clearly.
Also, you don’t have to write the word “conclusion” for concluding remarks. Your last paragraph automatically points to the fact that it’s conclusion.
Overall well tried.
Keep writing 🙂
4,5/10
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Mradul,
Introduction of your answer is good.
You have the content but you are not able to justify the demand of the question.
You have to mold your as to what is asked in question rather than simply writing what you know.
For this you can divide your answer into subheadings and then explain them each.
What you have explained is ” are ethics and laws related or not ?”
But read question again. What is asked is little different.
You only have to use this content only but in a slight different way.
Read the questions of other students to get an idea.
Also, read mentors comment to identify key demand of the question.
Don’t shy to use words mentioned in question in answers. Use them for subheadings.
Keep writing, keep improving 🙂
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Kartikey,
You have written well.
The 2nd paragraph of your answer – how ethics and law ensure peaceful society is core answer. You need to give at least half of your words to this part of the answer. Points like how laws and ethics ensure peace – by reward, penalty, self control etc can enrich your answer.
2nd part of the answer – whether ethics is necessarily la abiding – is well attempted with examples.
Conclusion is good too.
Overall well attempted
Keep writing to improve further. 🙂
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Rahul Kumar
You have written good introduction. It can be further improved by incorporating examples of both laws and ethics e.g. laws – IPC, CrPC etc. Ethics – societal values.
You have covered all part of the question that’s good. But 2nd part of answer – whether ethics is necessarily law abiding- is not explicitly covered and is hidden in your answer.
Better to give different subheadings to make each part of answer clear.
Conclusion is also good.
Overall well attempted.
Keep writing to improve further:)
5.5/10
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Santosh,
You have totally neglected what is being asked in the question and you have written what you know.
You have content but having it is not the enough to get you good score you need to mold it as per demand of the question.
The question was about how ethics and law ensure peace. What you have written is what is law and ethics.
Before writing always give some time to ponder over the demand of the question. Get a cue from mentors comment to understand demand of question.
You have the content but you have to mold it as per question.
Keep mentors comment in mind in next questions.
Keep writing to improve further 🙂
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@Swatantra sir please review
Utkarsha,
Your introduction is well written. You can add value to it by giving example of law e.g. IPC
You have written a very good answer.
Not much of scope in my opinion to change it. just add few more examples and always label your diagram/map.
Keep writing 🙂
Thank you Sir
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Rupesh 0
My words can be little harsh for you but you have to understand the ethics.
What you have written in last paragraph in no way suits the ethical mindset required from a civil servant. There is code of conduct for civil servants to understand to follow rule. But that is just one part. There is code of ethics to guide their behavior in discretionary situations and that are ample in life of administrators. Values like compassion, integrity, empathy ensure civil servants go beyond “by the book” to help citizens.
Also, in last paragraph of first page you have mentioned ” law enforcement officers ” decide the quantum of punishment”. It is not there scope to decide the guilty or punishment. It it the duty of judiciary. Policeman don’t have the moral or legal authority to decide the punishment.
Don’t try to write what you may have read in newspapers or seen somewhere. The only duty for civil servants is to serve citizens and they must uphold the Indian constitution always. Everything else is secondary.
Read other students copies.
Write with clear ethical perspective in paper 4.
Keep Writing 🙂
@Swatantra ok sir. Will keep that in mind.
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Sir ek saath upload nai ho paaya tha
Harshaa,
First of all in CSE mains only black and blue ink is allowed. So from next time try to use only this. Also write answer on UPSC style notebook, if not available on A4 size sheets.
You have not properly structured your answer.
Try to follow the rule of introduction-body-conclusion. And there should be separate paragraph.
Also, divide your answer into subheadings to attempt each part of the answer without missing it.
Introduction you have written is good. Try to add value to it by giving example. eg. Law – Indian constitution.
In body part of the answer you have given good points but they lack flow. Try to frame answer in your mind in structured way and then write it to ensure good flow.
You have the content. Work on structure part to get good score.
Keep writing to improve further:)
3.5/10
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@Swatantra
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Vishnu,
Your introduction is good. you can add one example of law and ethics in it.
In main part of answer- law and ethics ensure peace. You need to add some more argument to make your answer profound. Add few lines like ethics and law ensure peace by reward, penalties, self control etc.
In 2nd part of answer – is ethics essentially law abiding. You have to clearly explain it whether it is of not. You have attempted it but indirectly. Try to use the words given in question.
Also, you don’t have to give 2-3 example at one place. Follow the rule of one argument followed by one example.
Also, your 2nd example is wrong. Breaking covid protocol is punishable by law under Epidemic Disease Act. Read this again.
Conclusion is good.
Keep writing to improve further:)
3.5/10
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Vivek,
The core demand of question was – law and ethics ensure peace. You have just given a passing line to it. It should have been the half of your answer.
Question was not about what is ethical-legal-illegal. This was only hint for you to frame your answer. You have written whole answer on it.
2nd part of answer – whether ethics is necessarily law abiding , is well attempted by you.
Read other students answers to get a hold of good structure.
Keep writing to improve further:)