“Mentor’s Comments”
Introduction
Start your answer with definitions of the two with examples.
Body
Explain the difference between persuasion and social influence.
Depict how attitudinal change can be brought through persuasion with examples.
Conclusion
write why these two tools are important especially in present time when India suffers from various social and moral ills.
Ref id 422329
Please review
Vishal
You have the content. But you are still not moulding it as per the demand of the question. Random facts do not constitute a good answer.
Try to improve structure of your answer. Always thought of answer in mind before writing it.
Try to write in a sequential manner. E.g. what you have written in last line of your answer must have been somewhere in start of answer.
Also, examples are important but they can’t substitute good arguments. What have you written in 2nd page are examples. Try to write them with example.
Keep writing to improve further:)
2.5/10
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Subhashree,
You have written a good answer.
Only suggestion for you in this answer is try to write half or one liner example rather than one word. It’s always better to explain example a little bit.
Otherwise well written answer.
Keep writing to improve further:)
5.5/10
Please review it sir
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Shubham,
You have good content and way of writing. However, you must improve structure of answer.
This question consisted two parts. You have given nearly 3/4 words to first part and then just 1/4th to 2nd part.
If question have multiple part try to give equal emphasis to each part.
Your answer could have been better by if you had written concise first part.
Otherwise well written.
Keep writing to improve further:)
4.5/10
Refid# 422544
Anupam,
You need to act on following to improve your answer –
1. Try to give brief example in introduction itself.
2. Try to give arguments in your answer. Examples are important but they can’t be your sole answer. Follow the principle of one argument followed by one example.
3. You need concept clarity regarding social influence and persuasion. Read more on this.
Otherwise well structured.
Keep writing to improve further:)
3.5/10
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Sumita,
Your introduction is good.
The difference between social influence and persuasion is also explained well.
In 2nd part of answer, persuasion bring attitudinal change, you have to add more concrete arguments. You have focused solely on examples. Add points like how persuasion can bring attitudinal change – by counter-attitudinal information.
Conclusion is well written.
Keep writing to improve further.
4.5/10
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Order ID: #0000422294
Zulu 5
You have written a good answer.
It can be improved by working in below areas-
1. Try to give definitions of social influence and persuasion before explaining difference between them. Also, use Example here.
2. Conclusion can be improved further. Try to give a forward looking conclusion. It will add depth to your answer.
Otherwise good attempted.
Keep writing to improve further.
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Ankita,
Your introduction is good. Content and articulation of answer is also good.
You can improve in structure part of the answer to make your answer more powerful.
Try to give subheadings to your answer so that each part of answer become visible. E.g. you have attempted 2nd part of the answer, persuasion bring attitudinal change, but without heading it has merged with 1st part of the answer.
Same is the issue with conclusion. You have to write a proper conclusion to your answer.
Keep writing to improve further:)
Please review
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@Swatantra Sir please review
Utkarsha 5.5
You have written an overall good answer. But you need to take care of few things-
1. In difference between persuasion and social influence you have written “verbal” and “non-verbal” for them. I don’t know from where have you read that but it’s not true. Both include verbal and nonverbal ways simultaneously. Verbal simply means associated with words and nonverbal includes without words communication like facial expressions, para language etc.
2. Also, don’t use schematics and diagram without proper labelling. Without label it doesn’t serve any purpose.
Otherwise well attempted.
Keep writing to improve further 🙂
5.5/10
Order number #0000416426
Rupesh,
The first part of the question, difference between social influence and persuasion, you have attempted very well. Good example and good points overall.
In 2nd part of the answer, attitude change by persuasion, you need certain improvement. You have focused solely on example here. Try to not stick to just example. They are important but can’t be substitute to arguments. Use points like how persuasion can bring attitudinal change – by peer pressure, by credibility of speaker etc.
Use the principle of one argument followed by one example.
Rest you have good knowledge. Use it as per demand of question to get more score.
Keep writing to improve further:)
Review
Ref no 0000420120
Rajlaxmi,
Your introduction is good. But overall answer need certain improvements-
1. As suggested earlier, use schematics/diagram with proper labelling. Free floating diagram are not much value addition to the answer. Also, what you have written in 1st half of page you have shown exactly the same thing in the diagram below. Remember, schematics are drawn to save time and words. Use it to convey something new. Repetition doesn’t serve any purpose.
2. In 2nd part of the answer, you have written only examples. They are important but can’t be your whole answer. Try to give some concrete arguments. In this question points like how persuasion can bring attitudinal change – like by knowledge, source credibility etc. What aspects of attitude can be changed ? Now use examples to substantiate these.
Examples are supposed to be one-two line concise worded statements.
Keep writing to improve further
3.5/10
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Vivek,
Your answer lacks depth in certain areas.
1. Your introduction is not very clear and looks ambiguous. Use clear expression in your introduction to make it profound. Also, add example in it.
2. You have not addressed the question about difference between social influence and persuasion. Read question carefully so that you don’t miss any part.
3. Persuasion as a tool is well attempted.
Conclusion is also good.
Keep writing to improve further:)
3.5/10
UPI Reference No.-114715258066
Murari,
You have the content but need to mould it as per the demand of the question. It seems you are focused more on writing what you know rather than what is being asked.
Keep in mind following points while writing answer-
1. Respect word limit. You have way to exceeded the word limit.
2. If question has several sub-parts. Try to give each part equal emphasis. You have given just one paragraph to first part( difference between social influence and persuasion) and whole 2 pages to next part. Avoid it.
3. In 2nd part you have to explain how attitude change can be brought out by persuasion. Here you written your notes only without moulding them in accordance to what is asked. Remember, notes are just content. While writing answer you have to shape it in according to demand of question.
Keep writing to improve further:)
2.5/10
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@Swatantra sir please review
.
Arpit
You have written a good introduction. But you seems to lack concept clarity regarding social influence and persuasion.
I don’t know from where you have studied that persuasion is a mean and social influence is an end. Read it again for better clarification.
Other points are good.
In 2nd part of the answer you have given only examples. Remember, examples are good but they can’t be your whole answer. Try to give concrete arguments and then substantiate them by example. Examples are supposed to be 1-2 lines of concised words.
Keep writing to improve further:)
3.5/10
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Shivanshu
You have attempted well.
You can improve it further by improving in certain areas –
1. Give proper example. Your example of persuasion need correction. There is no scheme named Beti padao. It’s ‘Beti bachao beti padhao’
2. Your conclusion can be improved. Use more concrete arguments in it to give depth to your answer.
Keep writing to improve further:)
kindly review @Swatantra sir
ref id 420326
Deepali,
You seems to lack concept clarity of the topic. Or if you know it seems you are not able to convey it properly by words.
Your definition of persuasion is not correct. Read it again to improve it.
Also, you expression is not clear in example of social influence.
Also, give subheadings to your answer. When you have started writing 2nd part of the answer ( attitude change by persuasion). You have simply started writing points. How would examiner will know what are these points for ?
Also, your conclusion need improvement. Make it impactful by writing something about importance of persuasion.
To make your expression clear always read your answer after writing it. If you can guess the question from your answer only than it means that you have attempted it well.
Keep writing to improve further:)
2.5/10