“Mentor’s Comments”
Introduction
Write what you mean by freedom of expression.
Body
Write about J.S. mill’s view on Freedom of expression.
(In his book On Liberty he offered four reasons why there should be freedom of expression- Refer Political theory NCERT class 11th)
Link these reasons with Indian democracy citing various examples.
Conclusion
Point out the importance of freedom of expression Vis-a-vis democracy how it help in making it vibrant.
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Deepika ,
Introduction is very well articulated. However you could’ve avoided repetition of quote given in question.
J.S. Mill stressed upon freedom of expression even an idea seems to false. You need to bring that aspect to write his wholistic view.
Also you should write examples from Indian democracy along with these views then only you’ll be able to do the justice.
For example Mill stressed that even ideas that seems false may have some elements of truth hence must be protected. For eg at an initial stage giving reservation to weaker section was seen as bad idea However it proved otherwise.
Or issue of protection to a whistle blower.
Conclusion is good. However you could’ve used ideas given here in your discussion. Writing in the end do not add much values.
Read about more such thinkers specially all those mentioned in NCERTs.
Keep practicing:)
3.5/10
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Shubhashree,
You Introduction is fine. It would be better if you’ve written the importance of freedom of speech and expression.
It’s very hard to understand what you want to express with your whole writeup.
When a question is asked you to write in reference of something you should point out that reference by citing examples.
Here you need to write J.S. mills views then Support them with examples from Indian democracy.
At times your handwriting becomes illegible and expression becomes confusing.
Be very clear with your expression. Write short paragraphs.
Better example can be Written.
Mill stressed that even ideas that seems false may have some elements of truth hence must be protected. For ex. at an initial stage giving reservation to weaker section was seen as bad idea However it proved otherwise.
Also he pointed out an idea’s truthfulness can be tested only by placing it Infront of an opposite idea. Eg. At the time of independence there was debate whether India should follow capitalist path as most developed nation were capitalist or Socialist citing progress of USSR but our forefathers after heated debate went for mixed Economic model. Same debate started during LPG reforms
You can also give Example here of absolute freedom of expression given to lawmakers in legislature for that purpose.
Conclusion is fine.
Keep practicing:)
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Kindly review
Sonal,
It would be better if you talk about freedom of speech and expression in terms of ethics in intro. It’s paper 4 not paper 2.
You have written way too much words check your words limit. You’ll get only two pages for a 10 marks ques.
You have written a very good answer, but it you need to stick to the word limit. Also you should write Mill’s harm principle after his endorsement of freedom of speech.
Could have justified reasonable restrictions under article 19(2) with that principle.
Be concise and stick to the word limit.
Keep practicing:)
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Ankita,
Your Introduction is good but very long.
Rather than pointing out article 19 in Introduction it would be better if you’d use it in your discussion.
For reasons can be used to justify article 19 (1) and must be subtaintiated with examples from Indian democratic setup and with harms principal you can be used to justify reasonable restrictions under 19(2).
You have understood the question and written in write direction but arrangement of the arugements can be better and Inculcate examples in your answer.
When questions asked to write in reference of something you need to use those reference in exmples as justification.
Conclusion can be written better.
Rest is fine Keep practicing:)
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Kartikey,
Introduction is well articulated.
You have written a fine answer. Aptly Used examples.
Also go a step further and talk about Mill’s Harm’s principle and used to justify reasonable restrictions under article 19(2). It’ll make your answer wholistic.
In conclusion rather talk about importance of free speech for a vibrant democracy.
Rest is fine. Keep practicing:)
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Vishnu,
You have mixed up your answers here. Posted paper three with 4. Pls be careful
Judging by what you have written in one page. Introduction is very well articulated and you have summarized Mill’s ideas very well. It would be better if you used examples from Indian democratic setup.
This kind of expression will help you score good in Mains.
Keep it up. Keep practicing 🙂
2.5/10
Review
Ref no 0000420120
Rajlaxmi,
You have made disastrous mistake in your Introduction itself. Quote written is of Lincoln not Einstein. If you don’t know who said just don’t write name. Especially for such famous quotes. It’ll affected marks for whole paper. Also Mill was a British national not US
In core part question ask you to write it with reference to Indian democracy here you must use examples from Indian democracy to substantiate. Writing views without justification will not help you in getting marks.
Diagram is drawn unnecessarily and it should never be drawn in the end after the conclusion.
Also write Mill’s Harm’s principle to balance to justify reasonable restrictions under article 19(2).
Read others answers for better understanding.
Keep practicing:)
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Shivanshu 3,
Your Introduction is fine.
But you must be stick to the demand of the question. You have started addressing the demand of the question only from second page.
Views on first page are good but you need to mold them as per the demand of the question. Connect them with Mill.
Write Mill’s views in detail and use examples along with these views not in Isolation.
Read others’ answers as well and Keep practicing:)
kindly review @Swatantra sir
Ref id #420326
Deepali ,
Your Introduction is fine.
You must understand you’ll get marks only for writing relevant to the question.
Second paragraph can be avoided.
You can also concise 3rd paragraph in 1-2 lines.
Give more space and discuss in detail Mill’s ideas.
For better arrangement after writing 4 Reasons write Harm’s principal and justify article 19 (2).
You have understood the ques well and Written your answer in the right direction. But stick to the core demand of the question.
Keep practicing:)
3.5/10