Mentor’s comment:
- In the intro, briefly state how the internet could be used as a potential weapon by the anti-national elements.
- In the main body explain the modus-operandi of those who seek to leverage the internet for furthering their goals. Also, cite the example of meddling in the American Presidential elections by the use of social media. In the case of India cite the case of use of social media by ISIS to radicalize the youth. Also, explain how such activities challenge the security of the country.
- In suggestions, policies like using the technology itself to detect such moves, educating the people about the threats of these elements on the internet, etc can be cited.
Payment Id- MOJO0101D00A20979010
You cannot write PROTEST AGAINST GOVERNMENT IN JAMIA. That is a democratic set-up. Instead, say that RUMOUR MONGERS IN A TENSE SITUATION DURING PROTESTS CAN INCITE THE CROWD THROUGH FAKE OR COMMUNAL NEWS.
Never mix your subheadings in the content.
What is the purpose of the 1st point where you mentioned the IT Act? What is the purpose? How is it a way forward? Avoid such lose and general statements. Your statements should be specific and have a certain gravity.
Instead, you should have mentioned:
“In its bid to crack down on the spread of fake news and rumours circulated on online platforms like WhatsApp, Facebook and other online platforms, the central government has proposed stringent changes under the draft of Section 79 of the Information Technology (IT) that govern online content.”
The structure is fine in the answer.
Your overall discussion is in the right direction.
Good conclusion.
MOJO9c30X00D35455509
Deepanshu avoid so many corrections and cuttings in your answers.
I have mentioned this many times. This shows indecisiveness on your end. Think properly before writing.
It is good that you discussed the cons of the internet ban.
But in the first part of the answer, discuss the security dimensions with more depth. How the internet is an issue during unrest and can be used by our enemies.
The rest of the answer is fine.
Very good way forwards.
plz review
😀
I have told this to other Deepanshu above and I am saying the same thing to another Dipanshu again!!!!
Dipanshu avoid so many corrections and cuttings in your answers.
I have mentioned this many times. This shows indecisiveness on your end. Think properly before writing.
The answer is good.
The main body of the answer is handled very well.
It has all the angles needed.
Very detailed points are there.
Structuring is fine.
Your depth is near perfect.
Work on writing clearly.
Write on the UPSC answer sheets
MOJO0108C00A53108865
Very good attempt.
All the necessary parts have been answered.
Try to write smaller paragraphs.
Keep paragraphs for intro small.
The content has no problem anywhere.
The depth and the details are perfect!
The explanation is decent.
But to make your answer get that extra.5 or 1 marks, use some flowchart in the 1st or the 2nd part depending upon your suitability.
Ideally, the way forward in this answer can be discussed in the flowchart.
Also, underline imp points and highlight your subheadings.
MOJO0101500D20984167
A very good attempt.
You have discussed all the necessary points in a relevant manner.
The presentation is also decent.
The dimensions discussed in the main body, especially the impact of the internet shutdown is superb.
Keep it up.
Decent way forwards.
Underline imp points. That is the only suggestion here.
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The discussion in the 1st page and the flowchart in the 2nd page are of same nature.
Avoid this duplication of the points which are of same nature.
Instead of that flowchart, you could have discussed the implications of these shutdowns and then jump to the way forward.
The overall direction is OK but the content lacks depth.
Could have made it a better answer with more depth and dimensions.