Mentor’s comment:
- In the intro briefly explain what is an electoral bond.
- In the body, explain what was the rationale behind the introduction of the electoral bond. And what were the loopholes in it. Explain how the loopholes are proving as a hindrance in fulfilling its intended purpose.
- In the conclusion stress the need for plugging the loopholes left in the electoral bond.
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The content in the main body is fine.
But the conclusion is missing.
Make it a habit of writing conclusions in your answers.
You have covered all the arguments in a clean manner.
The coverage is very good.
Points are well written and explained in minimalistic form.
Good presentation and structure.
The balance is perfect.
Can we combine measures and conclusion in a paragraph and consider them as same?
Sir pls check
When writing intro, do mention the theme of the question as well.
Hence briefly mention at the end of the intro: “Despite its intended benefits, the scheme has raised many eyebrows in its functioning.” This way your content of the intro will be linked with the actual discussion needed in the answer. Intro should never be written in a silo but with proper linkage to the demand of the question.
Very good description of electoral bond scheme in the 1st part of the answer.
But do not overuse flowcharts and diagrams. They should be complementary to your overall content and should not be the sole style of presentation in your answer.
Use them in a certain part of the answer and the rest of the answer should be discussed in subheading-bullet points format.
UPSC Mains GS answers need some sort of explanations in their main body. Hence you cannot replace everything with flowcharts and diagrams.
The overall content is near perfect and well structured.
The presentation in terms of clarity is again fine.
But do write conclusions in your answers.
Never end the answer abruptly. There need to have some sort of soft landing at the end of your answer.
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Good intro.
What is the electoral bond scheme?
Do discuss its basic features in the 1st part of the answer after intro.
Otherwise, your base for the answer is not ready.
Secondly, there is no solid way forward in your answer.
The question expects you to give solutions to make the scheme better.
Apart from these issues, the overall content in the main is fine.
The content could have been made crisp with smaller explanation but its fine for now.
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